Let's Get Fresh

I’m talking about writing here, so don’t get your panties in a wad. Sorry, I do enjoy that phrase. It’s a throwback to my younger years and those memories of mouth cleanings with Dove soap.

Now, the fresh fruit was posted because I needed a picture. If it makes you hungry, I apologize, which I do frequently. Go on to the grocery store. I’m not a fruit stand.

Okay, back to fresh writing. Have you ever read a book so dinged with cliches you wanted to drown yourself in your dog’s water bowl? Are we guilty of using them in our work? You bet your bottom dollar. If you can’t beat them, join them. Or as George Carlin would say, “If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.”

At least he spiked it.

Allow me to share the meaning of cliche, even though we know them better than our own children: A saying, expression, idea or element of an artistic work which has been overused to the point of losing its original meaning or effect, rendering it a stereotype, especially when at some point it was considered meaningful or novel.

Although cliches can sometimes be used in fiction for comedic effect, we should remember a key word here. SOMETIMES. And it had better be funny. A no go and your readers might be swell enough to flip the page, but if you try again and fail, they could storm over to the fireplace, book or short story in hand, and snap a match. At least their wee bones would be warmed on a cold and stormy night.

Really, if we can, and we can, don’t socialize with cliches. They talk behind our backs, and give our readers wrinkles. Now there are loopholes, well, maybe one loophole. If a cliche can be spun around to make it zing-which, ahem..I’m guilty of- then do. But not too often.

Cliches aside, fresh prose should always be the standard. Think beyond the box. Give people thoughts for their pennies. We can always notch up our words, allowing them to sing opera, or belt out the Stones, Van Halen, Pink Floyd or Led Zeppelin. The key is throwing open the door and making an entrance. Dress up those words in black leather pants and let them knock back a good stiff whiskey, then strut them around like a freakin’ peacock!

Bad peacock, but you get the point. Don’t be afraid to let your words glitter and leave your characters room to open wide and speak their truth. So what if your crazy Aunt Polly, who holds tea parties for her cats, stands gape-jawed at something you’ve written? All the better. Maybe you’ve awakened something dormant in her. Maybe she’ll slap on some make-up, down a margarita, and go out dancing with her husband Carl.

Or maybe she won’t like you. Gasp!

If pleasing the world is our writing goal, we’d best hang our letters this instant and go open a bakery. Cupcakes anyone? People will always love sugar. So Sugars, if we’re going to write, please let characters breathe without the Aunt Polly’s of the world peering over our shoulders. Do send them out for cheesecake at a bakery in Bora Bora. And remember to pluck and add fresh stuff and not the wilted crap.

For fun, here’s a bowl full of stale cliches.

My favorite, colored up by George W. Bush: You can fool some of the people all of the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.

So true ye fiction writers!

Here’s more.

Breaking the bank

When all is said and done

Bored stiff

All hell broke lose

A wolf in sheep’s clothing

Don’t put all your eggs in one basket

Rome was not built in a day

Please feel free to add your own favorites. Maybe if we can secretly corral enough of them and drown them in the Hudson River, we can make the world a better place.

Catching Dreams

I wanted to post a picture of our little group at the Hawaii Writer’s Retreat, but for some reason I couldn't upload the pictures. Blasted technology! You can see it on my author website at:www.dorrainedarden.com


Dreams are powerful. We all have them, but catching them is another thing entirely. I’ve always felt you must first know what you want to have it. Writing our goals down is a great place to start. The Hawaii Writer’s Retreat has been on my list for seven years, and, sigh… I finally made it there.

There are many awesome writer’s retreats, but in my mind this was the mother of them all. And what a great mother she was. Seasoned authors attend here, still learning and growing. If you’re coming here to loll about the island, you’d best come a few days early. Once you start the six day retreat, or writing intensive, you’ll be drenched in classes. Classes before classes. Classes after classes. So many great author/speakers you won’t want to miss. Your day starts at 9:00 a.m. and ends, minus homework, at 4:30 p.m.

First let me mention our amazing author and instructor, Anne LeClaire. She had the patience of a monk and the grit of a soldier. Talented to the max, she left no rock unturned when it came to our manuscripts. This is no place for sissies. Or the ego. We were here to learn and learn we did. Anne had this uncanny ability to see exactly what was needed to turn our manuscripts into gold. She taught us how to flip our stories. She taught us to be better liars and that’s the truth! It's all in the details.

In regards to your story, ask yourself, what would happen if? Here’s an example from my latest: The Passion Diary. A pastor accidentally ends up with a woman’s diary, which changes their lives forever. Now: What if that same pastor takes a woman’s diary? Immediately the story has more flavor. Why would a man, let alone a pastor take a woman’s diary and read it? What happens now that he’s fallen in love with her? Don’t you want to know?

I do.

Oh, right. Guess I now have to figure that out. I also discovered this novel I’ve worked on off and on for four years needs to be told in first person rather than third. Holy crap. I now have to rewrite the whole ding dang thing. But you know what? I’m thankful because I just might have something in the end that will attract an agent. We like attracting agents, don’t we? And by the way, your first page should sing like Beyonce. Most agents will not turn to page two, so you must capture them on page one.

The women I worked with in class were not only talented but witty and humorous. It was a joy getting to know them and I hope to have them in my life for along time to come.

Do you know what separates the real writers from the rest? Yes, you need talent, but the key ingredient is perseverance. Some of you knew this already. Those, like myself, who have been slogging quietly along for years, believing when nobody else did. Belief in your abilities must start from the inside out.

It’s nice too, when people come along who see that you’re not just some fly by night, hokey poky, I’ll write when I want to kind of chick. I hope you are blessed beyond measure that way. I have been so grateful for those who’ve gotten aboard my dingy. We get nowhere in life without the support from others, which means we need to Pay it Forward also, which by the way, is a great movie.

In the coming days I’ll be sharing more tricks I learned to make your writing sing, so stayed tuned and keep catching those dreams.
Filed in Writing | Edit | No Comments

Kreative Blogger Awards

While writing in Hawaii, a delightful surprise was left on my blog: The Kreative Blogger Award.

I’m honored and thankful that Jon Strother, fellow writer and creator of Mad Utopia, chose little ole mine. Thank you, Jon. By the way, if you haven’t checked out Jon’s blog, do yourself a favor and stop in. He is the creator of #fridayflash, a venue for writers to post short stories. And post they do. You might want to share your own or just be awed at the imaginative pieces. Either way you can’t go wrong.

There are two parts to this award.

First: I must select seven blog's I feel deserve the award. Choosing favorites makes me nervous, but I must. These imaginative seven deserve nothing less. But please see my blog roll for all the creative, wonderful blog's I follow.

Second: I will be sharing seven of my favorite fiction authors. The suggestion was mystery, but since I don’t read mystery, I figured I could break the rules. Most writers break rules, don’t they, Jon?

Drum roll please……

Rhonda Laveen’s Wonderland-exploring life, love and interconnectedness
I recently discovered this blog gem and adore Rhonda’s fresh take on life. She’s not only original, but charming, taking on life one word at a time. You bet I’ll come back for more and have no doubt you will too.

Author Jai Joshi’s Tulsi Tree
A splendid storyteller, Jai weaves in fascinating details about her rich culture as well as writing experiences. Like turning a fast corner, you never know what you’ll find here. Her entries sparkle with wit, wisdom and humor.

Georganna Hancock-A Writer’s Edge
If you want the latest on the writing and publishing industry, Georganna has the edge. She’s in the thick of things and wants us there too. Her clever, informative style offers everything from author interviews to editorial services. Lucky her. Lucky us.


Deanna Schrayer-Deanna’s Blog, The life of a working writer mommy
How can you not love this from the title alone? Women know what a challenge it is to write and raise kids. When reading Deanna’s blog entries, it’s like pulling up a chair and sitting down to fried chicken and homemade gravy with our favorite people. Her style is friendly and warm, her stories original.


Cindy Tierney Adams- Gooblink.com, Obstreperous Heart
A boisterous, comical blog with serious undertones, Cindy captures us with her short stories, musings and writing experiences. An example title: After the kids, come the granny pants. Now you know you want to read her!

Angie Ledbetter-Gumbo Writer
Straight from the Louisiana Bayou this blog is flavored like a fantastic gumbo rue. Each post thrown in the pot is hot, hot, hot. You can’t stop eating, I mean reading.

Jenn Lidster-
When you visit her blog the visual alone will draw you in. The tree, stars and clouds suggest something magical, and Jenn doesn’t disappoint. This blog is stuffed with everything writing related, including author interviews.

You can find these fine word slinger's on my blog roll. Congratulations to all!


Second: Seven favorite fiction authors:


Barbara Kingsolver

Anne LeClaire

John Steinbeck

Alice Hoffman

Truman Capote

Paulette Jiles

Ray Bradbury

Hawaii Writer's Retreat

I'm wishing everyone a productive writing, photography, cooking, whatever makes you happy kind of week ahead. If it involves passion then you're on the right track.


I'll be back, blogging again in around seven days. Meanwhile I'll be in Hawaii, at a six day writing retreat, learning, growing, and relaxing on the beach with hibiscus in my hair. Oh, and hopefully I'll work in a hula or two since it is the official Hawaiian dance.

There will be plenty to share and I'll bring as much information back as I can. Meanwhile take care of yourself and your writing!

Cats, Dogs, and Kids

Neffie and Annie

It’s usually crazy in the summer months with all three girls home, and their friends in tow, but this summer it got a little crazier. We added a new member to the family. Her name is Annie. No, I didn’t have another baby. That would have needed to be an immaculate conception!

A new puppy came to live here. She is a mix of Schnauzer, Chihuahua and Chinese Crested. She needed a home and I’m the sucker who had one. Need I say more?

Annie zings circles around our nine-year-old dog, Lucky. He didn’t know what hit him, and for two days flashed green-eyed monster stares and skulked around like the good life had just ended. “When the heck is she leaving?” he seemed to say. “And why am I sharing my people and food with this thing?”

By day three, he was charmed.

He now runs and plays, trying to keep up with her. The old guy wears down quicker than she does, but I have a feeling she just tagged a few extra happy years to his life. They now snuggle together, and when he’s had enough of her antics, he’ll let out a low growl and she gives him space. They have reached an understanding.

My oldest daughter also added a new kitten, Neffie. She shares it with her college roommate, but this week guess where she is? Yes, here. It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas or the zoo.

Neffie is a sphinx. Remember the cat in Austin Powers? She is a smaller version of that naked thing with crinkles of skin. Think of a soft warm peach. Her skin feels like that. She does get cold, and tube socks cut to fit her work wonders, still leaving her the freedom to get into things. Last night, while we were out, she got in the fireplace, which instantly transformed her from a pinkish tan color to black.

We couldn’t help but laugh. Her personality is more like a dog than a cat. She greets you at the door, and likes to snuggle with you. She’s also very playful and mischievous. I’m already quite fond of Mr. Bigglesworth…gulp, Neffie.

Neffie will go home on Sunday and all things will go back to normal, if there is such a thing. School is starting for our youngest next week, the other two back at college. A part of me will be glad to be back in the routine, but the other half will miss the extra laughter from kids- our own and others-gathered round the table, telling stories and eating us out of house and home.

Well, we’ve still got the dogs.